Hammers Chat

Oziron wrote:I got into an airport lift once and someone had shat on the floor and wiped their arse with a sock. ....

(It wasn't the firmest of stools either)

Do you get in the lift on the turd floor?

I went to the toilet during a lesson once. I shit myself. Lucky for me it was rock hard so I could hold onto it until I made it to the bogs. It looked like my arse had a hard on :( Was this at a public school...and if it was you probably won the class school competition for the day and deservedly s...

Neville Bartos wrote:Can someone not come up with a fan group name that fits the acronym WHUTANG? I mean WHUISA and the one with FAG on the end are both a bit shit.

West Ham United Traitors Are Not Going?

I went to the toilet during a lesson once. I shit myself. Lucky for me it was rock hard so I could hold onto it until I made it to the bogs. It looked like my arse had a hard on

He reminds me of Vincent Price in The Tingler

belfasthammer wrote:On a serious note I just got my 6 stone award from Slimming World It works for me

You're six stone?


You must look like Karen Carpenter

Just want to acknowledge JPHammer and all else involved in the new layout of our glorious website..... Since Gonzo started this site in whatever year that was this place has got better and better in terms of its look and structural functionality. This stuff doesn't happen by magic so well done to a...

A dog thread that has morphed into a cat shit thread...

Cat owners smell of cat piss ... FACT

Whenever someone offers me trifle, whether at home, visiting or in a restaurant, I always without fail respond with ' You'll have to speak up I'm a trifle deaf' then look around with a smarmy grin as if it's the funniest joke in the world that no one has heard before....

What a cunt

Cunts with massive rucksacks on their backs who only take them off if a seat becomes available. I now carry a plastic bottle of piss and quietly unzip one of the bag's pockets and squirt it into it. Any suggestions how I could drop some shit into them without being noticed? Can't you slip in that b...