The Relegation Official Battle Thread

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Taansend
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The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by Taansend » Mon Feb 03, 2020 7:48 am

EVERYONE in the bottom six is in trouble although anyone in the bottom eleven is potentially fucked with a bad run.

There's only 7 points between Arsenal (10th) & us (18th) which is nowt with 13 games left - as history will tell us.

But here's a look at the the bottom six teams form. I doubt if any have a harder run in that us.

15 - Brighton - 26 points & 1 win since December 5th at Arsenal, so that's 1 win in 10 which was against Bournemouth who beat them in the return

16 - Bournemouth - 26 points & 2 wins in 2 but before that it was something like 1 win in 14 games including a 4 nil loss against us

17 - Aston Villa - 25 points & a very spotty record. Most unpredictable team in the league I think

18 - West Ham - 24 points & only 2 wins since November 30th. We have a manager who has got us out of this before but.....

19 - Watford - 23 points. Went through a great spell after the new coach with 4 wins & 2 draws in 6 games but not won in 3 (1 draw)

20 - Norwich - 18 points. Only beaten Bournemouth since late November.
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Castiron
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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by Castiron » Mon Feb 03, 2020 9:04 am

Sort the fucking title out :lol:
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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by dagenhamdave » Mon Feb 03, 2020 9:12 am

We have probably the hardest run in, and I do not think we have the players for a battle, we already have Championship players and have just bought a Championship striker, I think the writing is on the wall. :shock:

When you bring back Jordan from QPR, our strike force will be complete and ready for the Championship, once we offload our so called "better" players, whats left and a few youngsters and we will have to start again. :?

Maybe it will not be as bad as this year, hopefully.
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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by Newmarket » Mon Feb 03, 2020 9:38 am

Taaaaans .

Get fucked.
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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by eastcoastclaret » Mon Feb 03, 2020 10:11 am

I can’t see this thread getting many responses over the coming weeks Taans...
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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by palerider » Mon Feb 03, 2020 10:22 am

Moyes out.
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The cheque's in the post. Honestly.

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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by Whiskyman » Mon Feb 03, 2020 11:34 am

I have dusted off Nigel, the super algorithm I created a couple of seasons back to predict the relegation issues. He wasn't 100% accurate in his predictions but I have got out the WD40, tightened a few nuts and replaced the oil and here are his predictions. I, or rather Nigel, have considered everyone from Palace upwards (currently 30 points) to be safe.

So here are the final Premier League placings in reverse order, with Nigel's predicted outcome. These GUARANTEED results only take us up to Matchday 31 (when we play Spurs). Nigel is programmed to factor in when teams who are safe have nothing to play for and these teams can't easily be identified yet, as everyone has something to aim for. After Matchday 31 I'll give him another shot of WD40 and produce the final bottom 6.

20. Naaarch. They will lose at Wolves & Sheff Utd and at home to Liverpool. They will scrape draws at home to Leicester & Everton and, surprisingly beat Southampton. To be on 23 points.

Joint 18th. (Nigel doesn't predict scores so goal difference can't be factored in0. Watford and West Ham.
Watford will lose at Brighton, Man United & Burnley and also at home to Liverpool. They will draw at Palace and at home to Leicester. 25 points

West Ham. Nigel only sees one point incoming. At home to Saints. Defeats at Man City, Liverpool, Arsenal & Spurs and at home to Wolves. 25 points

Bournemouth. Like West Ham Nigel only sees 1 point which will come at home to Palace. They will lose at home to Chelsea and also at Sheffield United,Burnley, Liverpool & Wolves. 27 points.

Aston Villa. Nigel foresees 3 draws from their next 6. At home to Sheffield United and Chelsea and at Newcastle. Defeats at home to Spurs and at Saints & Leicester. 28 points.

Brighton. Will win their next game, at home to Watford and also pick up draws at home against Palace & Arsenal. Defeats at Sheffield United, Wolves & Leicester.

DISCLAIMER.
Both Nigel and I are aware that cuntishness is prevalent on this forum. It is therefore necessary to advise all readers that anyone placing wagers based on Nigel's expert predictions will not get any sympathy, or of course reimbursement, from me should their wager be unsuccessful.
Please remember our motto--Cum cunnus semper cunnum
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TRADITION--Just because we've always done it like this doesn't mean it's not incredibly SILLY

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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by Brookbonds73 » Mon Feb 03, 2020 11:41 am

Bilic out.
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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by palerider » Mon Feb 03, 2020 11:44 am

Syd King out.
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The cheque's in the post. Honestly.

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Re: The Relegation Official Battle Thread

Post by palerider » Mon Feb 03, 2020 11:49 am

Whiskyman wrote:
Mon Feb 03, 2020 11:34 am
I have dusted off Nigel, the super algorithm I created a couple of seasons back to predict the relegation issues. He wasn't 100% accurate in his predictions but I have got out the WD40, tightened a few nuts and replaced the oil and here are his predictions. I, or rather Nigel, have considered everyone from Palace upwards (currently 30 points) to be safe.

So here are the final Premier League placings in reverse order, with Nigel's predicted outcome. These GUARANTEED results only take us up to Matchday 31 (when we play Spurs). Nigel is programmed to factor in when teams who are safe have nothing to play for and these teams can't easily be identified yet, as everyone has something to aim for. After Matchday 31 I'll give him another shot of WD40 and produce the final bottom 6.

20. Naaarch. They will lose at Wolves & Sheff Utd and at home to Liverpool. They will scrape draws at home to Leicester & Everton and, surprisingly beat Southampton. To be on 23 points.

Joint 18th. (Nigel doesn't predict scores so goal difference can't be factored in0. Watford and West Ham.
Watford will lose at Brighton, Man United & Burnley and also at home to Liverpool. They will draw at Palace and at home to Leicester. 25 points

West Ham. Nigel only sees one point incoming. At home to Saints. Defeats at Man City, Liverpool, Arsenal & Spurs and at home to Wolves. 25 points

Bournemouth. Like West Ham Nigel only sees 1 point which will come at home to Palace. They will lose at home to Chelsea and also at Sheffield United,Burnley, Liverpool & Wolves. 27 points.

Aston Villa. Nigel foresees 3 draws from their next 6. At home to Sheffield United and Chelsea and at Newcastle. Defeats at home to Spurs and at Saints & Leicester. 28 points.

Brighton. Will win their next game, at home to Watford and also pick up draws at home against Palace & Arsenal. Defeats at Sheffield United, Wolves & Leicester.

DISCLAIMER.
Both Nigel and I are aware that cuntishness is prevalent on this forum. It is therefore necessary to advise all readers that anyone placing wagers based on Nigel's expert predictions will not get any sympathy, or of course reimbursement, from me should their wager be unsuccessful.
Please remember our motto--Cum cunnus semper cunnum
I've consulted Jasmine, my mystic cat.

If I feed her enough she craps large amounts.

And will then arrange with her paws, with said crap on the kitchen floor, actual words.

I did this last night and was rewarded with a message this morning.


We're fucked
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The cheque's in the post. Honestly.

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