Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

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Whiskyman
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Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by Whiskyman » Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:04 am

We've got a thread on favourite sports so I thought I'd put up one at the opposite end of the spectrum. Which sports would you go out of your way to avoid having to watch. Here's a few ideas. I'd rather watch dust settle than put up with any of these.

Tennis
Rugby Union--can tolerate Rugby League because it's faster.
Grid Iron (American Football)
Darts--Not a sport, a fucking pub pastime
Snooker--Play it occasionally but as a viewing spectacle, fucking forget it.
Equestrian Events--Particularly that bloody horse dancing crap. Mrs W is a great fan unfortunately and she gets the right arse when I laugh if someone falls off their mount which is the only thing that makes it watchable imo.
Athletics Field Events--Like spear throwing and lead weight chucking. And fucking gymnastics.
Ice Skating--Another of Mrs W's likes. I love it when a competitor goes arse over tit.
Diving--That's into the water, not the art of simulation on a footy field.

And any other "sport" I might have overlooked where the result is decided by votes given by judges.
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eastcoastclaret
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by eastcoastclaret » Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:26 am

Slippery stones
Cannot fucking stand it!
Curling, It’s the only ‘sport’ Scots are any good at...
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gonna need a bigger boat...my thumbs have gone weird...weleese bwian...I didn't eat the salmon mousse...nice beaver...like a glove...I have nipples Greg...the details of my life...he's not the messiah....

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BlackDiamond
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by BlackDiamond » Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:57 am

Whiskyman wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:04 am
We've got a thread on favourite sports so I thought I'd put up one at the opposite end of the spectrum. Which sports would you go out of your way to avoid having to watch. Here's a few ideas. I'd rather watch dust settle than put up with any of these.

Tennis
Rugby Union--can tolerate Rugby League because it's faster.
Grid Iron (American Football)
Darts--Not a sport, a fucking pub pastime
Snooker--Play it occasionally but as a viewing spectacle, fucking forget it.
Equestrian Events--Particularly that bloody horse dancing crap. Mrs W is a great fan unfortunately and she gets the right arse when I laugh if someone falls off their mount which is the only thing that makes it watchable imo.
Athletics Field Events--Like spear throwing and lead weight chucking. And fucking gymnastics.
Ice Skating--Another of Mrs W's likes. I love it when a competitor goes arse over tit.
Diving--That's into the water, not the art of simulation on a footy field.

And any other "sport" I might have overlooked where the result is decided by votes given by judges.
The funny thing with Equestrian Events, the horse is really the star. If it doesn't move in a horsey elegant manner,or dance and prance - like a big gay horse showing off - then regardless,whether the rider is a distinguished reprobate Royal or an entitled blue blood or just some sponsored chav by a reputable stable, they are fucked.

And you don't want to be fucked by a horse - unless of course you do,hence the appeal...
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mkhammer
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by mkhammer » Wed Oct 09, 2019 11:29 am

Whiskyman wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:04 am
We've got a thread on favourite sports so I thought I'd put up one at the opposite end of the spectrum. Which sports would you go out of your way to avoid having to watch. Here's a few ideas. I'd rather watch dust settle than put up with any of these.

Tennis
Rugby Union--can tolerate Rugby League because it's faster.
Grid Iron (American Football)
Darts--Not a sport, a fucking pub pastime
Snooker--Play it occasionally but as a viewing spectacle, fucking forget it.
Equestrian Events--Particularly that bloody horse dancing crap. Mrs W is a great fan unfortunately and she gets the right arse when I laugh if someone falls off their mount which is the only thing that makes it watchable imo.
Athletics Field Events--Like spear throwing and lead weight chucking. And fucking gymnastics.
Ice Skating--Another of Mrs W's likes. I love it when a competitor goes arse over tit.
Diving--That's into the water, not the art of simulation on a footy field.

And any other "sport" I might have overlooked where the result is decided by votes given by judges.
Bloody hell mate..I love all those... Ice skating not so much maybe...but depends on how fit the
girl is...yes I'm that bloody shallow.... :lol:
Don't think there's a sport I don't like and watch...I'd watch tiddly winks,if had to..

C'mon mate Dressage is brilliant...was watching it at some show onetime...had to be literally
dragged away....fascinating..
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by eskimo joe » Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:00 pm

Whiskyman wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:04 am
We've got a thread on favourite sports so I thought I'd put up one at the opposite end of the spectrum. Which sports would you go out of your way to avoid having to watch. Here's a few ideas. I'd rather watch dust settle than put up with any of these.

Tennis
Rugby Union--can tolerate Rugby League because it's faster.
Grid Iron (American Football)
Darts--Not a sport, a fucking pub pastime
Snooker--Play it occasionally but as a viewing spectacle, fucking forget it.
Equestrian Events--Particularly that bloody horse dancing crap. Mrs W is a great fan unfortunately and she gets the right arse when I laugh if someone falls off their mount which is the only thing that makes it watchable imo.
Athletics Field Events--Like spear throwing and lead weight chucking. And fucking gymnastics.
Ice Skating--Another of Mrs W's likes. I love it when a competitor goes arse over tit.
Diving--That's into the water, not the art of simulation on a footy field.

And any other "sport" I might have overlooked where the result is decided by votes given by judges.
You didnt leave much out did you?! Go with most of those but prefer Rugby Union over league. Add to the list Formula 1, wrestling, squash, Basketball.
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Whiskyman
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by Whiskyman » Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:07 pm

mkhammer wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 11:29 am
Whiskyman wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:04 am
We've got a thread on favourite sports so I thought I'd put up one at the opposite end of the spectrum. Which sports would you go out of your way to avoid having to watch. Here's a few ideas. I'd rather watch dust settle than put up with any of these.

Tennis
Rugby Union--can tolerate Rugby League because it's faster.
Grid Iron (American Football)
Darts--Not a sport, a fucking pub pastime
Snooker--Play it occasionally but as a viewing spectacle, fucking forget it.
Equestrian Events--Particularly that bloody horse dancing crap. Mrs W is a great fan unfortunately and she gets the right arse when I laugh if someone falls off their mount which is the only thing that makes it watchable imo.
Athletics Field Events--Like spear throwing and lead weight chucking. And fucking gymnastics.
Ice Skating--Another of Mrs W's likes. I love it when a competitor goes arse over tit.
Diving--That's into the water, not the art of simulation on a footy field.

And any other "sport" I might have overlooked where the result is decided by votes given by judges.
Bloody hell mate..I love all those... Ice skating not so much maybe...but depends on how fit the
girl is...yes I'm that bloody shallow.... :lol:
Don't think there's a sport I don't like and watch...I'd watch tiddly winks,if had to..

C'mon mate Dressage is brilliant...was watching it at some show onetime...had to be literally
dragged away....fascinating..
I really am sorry mate. I never realised. I hope this is of some use and that you will be able to find some peace and comfort at the end of what must be a long and difficult eoad.

https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk/find-a-therapist/

Dressage FFS. :lol:
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Whiskyman
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by Whiskyman » Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:11 pm

Thanks EJ. I forgot all about fucking wrestling. Probably because I'd class it as performing arts rather than sport.

But I agree with you. I'd rather have my eyes plucked out than watch that fag fest. I can understand women going to it but the idea of blokes watching two oiled up, tat covered, scantily clad blokes grappling with each other is slightly worrying.

Scratch that. It's deeply fucking disturbing.
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by Whiskyman » Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:15 pm

eastcoastclaret wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:26 am
Slippery stones
Cannot fucking stand it!
Curling, It’s the only ‘sport’ Scots are any good at...
Ahh yes. Bowls on ice. Didn't I remember the Jocks winning a medal at it not too long ago.? Seem to remember the commentator creaming himself over excellent brushwork. Like he was discovering a recently found bloody Rembrandt.
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by palerider » Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:18 pm

Whiskyman wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:15 pm
eastcoastclaret wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 10:26 am
Slippery stones
Cannot fucking stand it!
Curling, It’s the only ‘sport’ Scots are any good at...
Ahh yes. Bowls on ice. Didn't I remember the Jocks winning a medal at it not too long ago.? Seem to remember the commentator creaming himself over excellent brushwork. Like he was discovering a recently found bloody Rembrandt.
I didn't mind curling tbh as it's only on once every 4 years. But darts ? Totally agree.....not a sport. Or Snooker.

Back to my definition of sport.

It's only a sport if you could possibly kill yourself or someone else if you partook in it whilst blind drunk.

Although I guess if you aimed for double 16 and were that drunk you could take an eye out.
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Re: Sports To Be Avoided At All Costs

Post by Whiskyman » Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:30 pm

palerider wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:18 pm
Whiskyman wrote:
Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:15 pm


Ahh yes. Bowls on ice. Didn't I remember the Jocks winning a medal at it not too long ago.? Seem to remember the commentator creaming himself over excellent brushwork. Like he was discovering a recently found bloody Rembrandt.
I didn't mind curling tbh as it's only on once every 4 years. But darts ? Totally agree.....not a sport. Or Snooker.

Back to my definition of sport.

It's only a sport if you could possibly kill yourself or someone else if you partook in it whilst blind drunk.

Although I guess if you aimed for double 16 and were that drunk you could take an eye out.
I used to like playing the odd game of arrows down the local. Same as every so often I go with a friend to the local snooker hall. But like you I don't consider either as sport, although I imagine one could kill another person with one of those long rests if handled inexpertly, even when sober.

And imo no "sport" whereby the points are awarded by a panel of judges, like the poxy Eurovision Song Contest, deserves the title. I've even heard some planks want darts to be included in the Olympics.

What next ? Fucking dominoes.
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TRADITION--Just because we've always done it like this doesn't mean it's not incredibly SILLY

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